Mr. Bean's Diary

Mr. Bean's Diary is a fiction book that was released on 29th October, 1992. It represents a "Highbury District Council" diary for 1993, written by Mr. Bean. The book was re-printed in a much smaller format as Mr. Bean's Pocket Diary, released on 31st August, 1994; the content is identical.

Plots[]

A number of short stories are told by reference via the sequence of diary entries.

Irma Gobb first appears as the librarian at the library Mr. Bean visits; although he takes her out several times, she does not become his girlfriend, and marries "Giles Gummer" by the end of the book.
January 4-5 contain a reference to Mr. Bean's visit to the swimming pool in The Curse of Mr. Bean, including a draft of the letter of apology for his trunks coming off.
There is also a reference to Mr. Bean taking Irma Gobb to see a horror film in The Curse of Mr. Bean which reveals that he then spent two weeks sleeping with the light on, nailing boards over his front door, and calling the local vicar to perform an exorcism.
Mr. Bean loses his diary and has it returned to him by his neighbour "the man in Number 3" (not Bruiser Sr.). Mr Bean offered a reward to any finder of the diary on the first page, but avoids his neighbour for the entire book to avoid paying it. When the Man in Number 3 plays an April Fool's joke on Mr. Bean, he becomes furious and begins to repeatedly antagonise him by stealing his milk deliveries, ringing his doorbell at antisocial times, and posting rotten fish through his letterbox. The end of the book reveals his name to be "Martin Davis", matching that of a British comedian.
Mr. Bean launches a campaign to prevent dog fouling in the local park which includes unsuccessfully canvassing local residents and finally a bizarre plan to launch his Mini from the roof of a building with glider wings in order to bomb dog owners with horse manure, which is detected and preventing by the police before he can launch the car. One person who responds positively to his canvassing, "Mr. Wilkinson", takes advantage of his hospitality and then steals his car, which is returned to him by the police. Near the end of the diary is a newspaper clipping revealing that months later Mr. Wilkinson won 3 million pounds in a lottery, and gave an interview making no mention of Bean's generosity.
Mr. Bean enters a raffle for a holiday in Barbados and plans the trip extensively in advance before winning, only to be unable to find the ticket and lose the holiday to the second place winner. (The illustration on the back cover of the book shows the ticket attached with elastic.)
Mr. Bean buys a terrapin which dies because he forgets to feed it. Later, he also forgets to feed Mrs. Wicket's dog Kipper while she is away and kills it too.
Mr. Bean joins an Entymology Club at the local community centre and is thrown out for collecting and labelling "pressed insects" in the pages of the diary.
Mr. Bean joins a Poetry Class and is thrown out for loudly reading horrific poetry on the subject of vomiting and bloodletting. He decides to join a Kendo Club instead and shortly challenges the Sensei to a duel, which results in him needing a neckbrace from hospital.
Mr. Bean's oven breaks down and so he attempts to bake a cake by dumping a bag of flour and eggs on a community bonfire on November 5th. It is mistaken for a bomb by local police and he is arrested.
Mr. Bean contacts a spirit medium, Madame Sandra, to attempt to contact his dead mother in order to ask where the plunger is to unblock the sink.
The book ends on a sad note as Mr. Bean writes repeated letters to Santa asking for a drum kit, but since he has no-one to actually exchange presents with, buys himself a brass hook for his toilet door and spends Christmas alone.

References[]

Julia Wicket appears for the first time as Mr. Bean's landlady, although she is referred to only as "Mrs. Wicket" and has no direct interaction with him.
Mr. Bean's address is listed as 12 Arbor Rd, London. This is a real place, but is a house rather than an apartment block and the postcode given in the book is wrong.
Mr. Bean is revealed to be a fan of Shirley Bassey, and of a fictional horror writer named Zak Brood.
Mr. Bean's school report appears in the back pages of the diary. An ink smudge hides his first name, but he is revealed to have left Secondary School in 1971. In the UK currently this would happen at age 16, although in 1971 Mr. Bean could have left school several years younger. Mr. Bean is therefore between 35 and 38 for most of the book.
The book suggests that, after learning of Giles Gummer's designs on Irma Gobb, Mr. Bean had intended to attack him with an air rifle and other items, including a 10" knife (although this was presumably to cut the rope also mentioned in the list, not to stab Gummer), but was intercepted by the police before doing any harm. The book confirms that Mr. Bean is known to police and was being actively monitored after the announcement of Irma Gobb's wedding as a result.
Mr. Bean's grandfather dies on his 90th birthday in the diary, meaning he was born in 1903 and was around 52 when Mr. Bean was born.
The end of the book contains a very brief note suggesting that Mr. Bean is planning a "sex change" during 1994.